Drowning in Junk Mail – Getting Rid of Junk Mail the Scientology way

Now that I am on a rampage to stop all the junk mail coming to my house I will turn to the Scientologists for help. No wait ex-Scientologists, that is who’s help I need. Scientology is infamous for the amount of crap they send to people on their mailing lists. Sometimes it feels like the only way to escape all the mailers is to die. And according to ex-members sometimes even that isn’t enough.

Let’s peek into a thread from a few years ago on Why We Protest.net to get some ideas on stopping junk mail.

The first great idea is to cost them money:

“Every time they send you something with a Freepost return address, use it to send them a brick.”

“Came here to say this; was not disappoint. Literally tape the BRE (Bulk Reply Envelope) to a brick and drop it into the local mail box. As far as I know, there no limitation to the charges posted on a BRE, so you really cost them a lot by affixing a BRE to a brick or an old refrigerator or something and making the post office aware of it.

I know of no laws preventing you from photocopying the BRE and including bags of dog feces, etc but do not quote me on that.”

Alas you can’t mail a brick 😦
From the Straightdope, From MotherJones.com

“According to rule 917.243(b) in the Domestic Mail Manual, when a business reply card is “improperly used as a label” — e.g., when it’s affixed to a brick — the item so labeled may be treated as “waste.” That means the post office can toss it in the trash without further ado.”

But you can stuff the envelope with silly stuff, and make it weigh more

“But save any prepaid return envelopes. Stuff them with critical leaflets, or even a joint and send them back. Temptation is a bitch.”

“Recycle your unwanted piles of Jehovah’s Witness doorstep trash by sending unsolicited Sci-mail back to the cult with JW tracts inside.”

Let’s pull out those videos from the Mother Jones article

Stuffing envelops with nonsense that weighs a lot, I may have something like that available.

A tip for UK residents, unfortunately in the US all “return to sender” mail is tossed now, so that won’t stop anything.

“Don’t “return to sender”, but forward the post instead. Nowadays, a stamp only covers the initial postal journey, and not any forwarding. If you forward it to a dying org (say, Plymouth or Sunderland…) all the Scilons get is a standard notification that there’s an item with insufficient postage for them to collect. So they have to take a trip to the postal depot, where they get invited to pay to collect their own shit.”

“Return the mail with a change of address. Ask the cult to send the mailings to the new address… which is an address for a Scientology organization (church)  in another state.”

That is real culture jamming going on. In this case I would give a change of address from one scammer to another or one Super PAC to another. It would be like a snake eating it’s tail.

Update: The following no longer works on Scientology mail.

“If in the US, claim that you find their literature to be unwanted sexually oriented advertisements?

No, srsly:
Unwanted Junk Mail

U.S. Post Office Form 2150, Prohibitory Order Against Sender has been replaced by Form 1500. Form 1500 is available for free in .pdf format via the USPS website.

Do not let the wording on the form fool you, it can be used to stop ANY piece of mail. Page 13 of Postal Bulletin 21977 states:

Postmasters may not refuse to accept a Form 1500 because the advertisement in question does not appear to be sexually oriented. Only the addressee may make that determination.

Most clerks will not know what to do with Form 1500 and may direct you to the Post Master.

ROWAN v. U. S. POST OFFICE DEPT. , 397 U.S. 728 (1970)

Getting Scientology blocked from sending “smut” through the mail would be a win of beauty.”

WHAT? I can declare all junk mail porn even if it isn’t!?

Wiki page for Prohibitory Order Against Sender form 1500
More help for from 1500 from Knowmore.org

http://about.usps.com/forms/ps1500.pdf (PDF)

Update: Here is my how to guide to form 1500

This is somewhat complicated and involves me spending money. I will leave this for the last step and the most tenacious junk mail. Now about that envelope stuffing…

Update one year later: This turned out to be the best weapon I found to stop scam junk mail. I wound up sending out over 100 form 1500’s over the past year. If you are trying to stop Scientology junk mail try to pick a piece that is selling something. A course package, a lecture.

Update many years later: You can no longer use a for 1500 on Scientology mail. I have gotten feedback from people who have tried. They were told you can not use a form 1500 on religious mail.