Toady, 19 pieces of junk mail came to my house, and none of it was for me. It belongs to an elderly relative in the early stages of dementia who can no longer take care of herself. When my little branch of the family went to her house to start the process of getting her the proper care she needs, they discovered piles of mail. All over the house. It ranged from catalogs to 419 Nigerian scams. When they dived into her finances to figure out how to pay for the full time care she needs, they found that she had written checks for some of these scams. They immediately put stops on all her checks. Some were in the hundreds of dollars. Imagine this: they are trying to take care of her, clean her house, and everyday 20 pieces of mail come, and she wants to see it. What if one of the lotteries pays off? But this politician needs help passing a bill. This military family needs help buying groceries. She could not stop. So they have put in a change of address, my address. Everyday I go through a stack of mail looking for that one real piece. An insurance bill, a medical claim. Most of her bills are now on auto pay, but there is always that stray piece of mail that she actually needs. This has been going on for a month now and I am sick of it. I am fighting back. I am going to shame the people who spew out this predatory junk mail. No one is safe: politicians, starving children, Nigerian presidents. All of them are going down. I am also going to try to stop as much of this crap from getting to my house as possible.
Step 1 to getting rid of junk mail sign up for DMAChoice, then Catalog Choice or if you have a fancy smart phone PaperKarma. They are like the do-not-call list for junk mail. OptOutPreScreen.com is for credit card offers. If you hate the Red Plum coupons everyday opt-out here This has already been done for her. All that is left is the scummy underbelly of the junk mail world. I have made a step by step guide on how to stop junk mail here
Of the 19 pieces of junk mail I received today, I picked these 6. They are all flashy, and we have a couple of political celebrity guest stars.
Headquarters of Allenvail & Crane Executive Chambers Office of the President. This one looks very official, it is from the President, and it is an official matter. Better open it up.
This looks very official. It is signed stamped and has a holographic seal. But it is only a 419 scam. If I give them $20 they will give me a Guaranteed $2,590,000.00 payout in cash and prizes. If you get this mail or something like it put it in the trash, or if you get a lot of mail like this jump to step 3 of my Start Page.
These 3 look much more promising.
Direct Delivery Systems, from the Netherlands. This one from Direct Delivery Systems says that I have a package on a dock. It is a check for $3,680.00, and if I send them $20 they will mail it to me. If you get this mail or something like it put it in the trash, or if you get a lot of mail like this jump to step 3 of my Start Page.
Entrant Reporting Services from the Netherlands. Another 419 from the Netherlands. I am a little disappointed in the quality, it is just a fuzzy photocopy. The envelope is so much better than the contents. If you get this mail or something like it put it in the trash, or if you get a lot of mail like this jump to step 3 of my Start Page.
Political Junk mail from Rand Paul and Ted Cruz. The person to whom all this mail is going to is a life long Republican donor. When her family took over her finances they put a stop on all checks, some of which were in the hundreds of dollars, to different politicians across the country. I am not picking on one party or the other, but the predatory language used in the mailings.
Before you even open the envelope there is a crisis. Today it is the Debt Ceiling. “If we’re going to rein in out-of-control spending and prevent out nation from fiscal catastrophe, we urgently need more strong conservative Senators to help us fight.” “Would you please Return the enclosed reply form with the most generous contribution possible of $35, $50, $100, $150, or even $250 right away before out critical March 31st deadline?” Guess what an older person with early signs of dementia would do? She would write out a check for $250 to fight those nasty politicians in DC. The $250 that is supposed to pay for her in home health care.
Senator Rand Paul, National Pro-Life Alliance. I thought I had hit the jackpot when I opened this bit of political junk mail. The National Pro-Life Alliance wants to pass a Life at Conception Act. I am supposed to sign each of the certificates send them back to the National Pro-Life Alliance and they will send them to Barbara Boxer, Dianne Feinstein, Jerry McNerney, Mitch McConnell, and John Boehner. And a generous check of course.